It's pouring rain today, and my eye continues to water. I have had viral conjunctivitis for about 8 weeks now. Unfortunately, like the common cold virus (which may have actually caused this issue), there is not a lot I can do besides wait it out. I look like I am constantly weeping, and should probably just walk around with a tissue affixed to my eyeball.

My life feels a little watery right now; formless, sometimes rapid-churning like a rushing river, sometimes still and a little stagnant like a pond, with all of the activity and changes happening below the surface. I am between R3 and R4 of Leadership and it has really stirred up a lot in me. I am feeling the need to shift gears a bit with work; I am rethinking my love for urban living, and my husband and I are working through some issues. Basically, I am questioning everything in my life and while I don't see any major changes ahead, most areas are due some tweaks.

The other day I actually said, "OK! ENOUGH PERSONAL GROWTH!" when something went wrong and I gritted my teeth and smiled and told myself that I was learning from it. While I know that IS actually true, it feels exhausting right now to grow and grow and feel like I am busting at the seams and outgrowing my old self like a pair of jeans. Exhausting, but inevitable. I know that this watery place is critical and that I need to stay with it and that things will become clear.

This quote really spoke to me:

If water is too clear, it will not contain fish; people who are too cautious will never gain wisdom.
Chinese proverb